(Va Stan Park)
I am not able to be classified as an atheist in light of such ideas, but this is irrelevant in any case. At any rate I do not limit myself to being “godless” or “atheist”, as these are very much not any better than what religions provide us. My only concern is what is here right now, this very moment, and discovering all that I am able to of such things. Any study, as long as it provides a means to Truth, Knowledge, and an increase to my Being is a valid study at this point. Fantastic or not, religions have spoken of what we call scientific truths for thousands of years. We quite simply do not see it typically these days because of all the shrouding the ancients did upon the words and stories. Be sure though, that as I conduct my investigations, I am focused upon science heavily. The only difference between the science I use and the secular society, is that I boldly study EVERYTHING under this light, rather than a common tendency I see of casting things off as “superstition”, “myth”, “occult”, “fantasy”, “illusion”. For anything that exists, of which everything which we can refer to exists in some fashion, there is something there and the science I use is all about finding out what is happening, how it is happening, and why it is happening.
Now on to my story…
I grew up in a home which half advocated Christianity and of which the other half advocated free thinking and self-discovery. For the first many years of my life I supported Christianity as I was told horrifying stories that if I did not I would be banished to Hell. Feeling oppressed and not actually gaining any insight to the questions which raised in my mind from the free thinking avocation I had been receiving, I decided to break with church all together. A decision which would prove to lead me down a long and complex road of the human mind and the universe itself.
I remained silent to my Christian mother for many years as it was to be necessary for me to have formulated my thoughts well on religious manners before speaking of such departures with the church.
My first inclination was towards Wicca. This was inspired after a meeting with now one of my most treasured friends who is Wiccan. I never actually became a practitioner as the religion seemed to me just as void as the one I was looking to leave, but it did leave certain marks upon my mind. For the first time I had researched a faith outside of my own, and I started to notice commonality between faiths. As I was only 15 and inexperienced I did not formulate much theory at that time though.
My next steps were towards researching anything and everything I could get information on for religions and spirituality both common and hidden. Druidism, Buddhism, Zen, Taoism, Masonry, general Pagan thought, and so much more were all on the list of research.
Around the age of 17 though, I had a brief encounter with Satanism (like any proper rebellious teen would go to when seeking a departure with Christianity), which left another mark upon me. This was the first time I had encountered literature on practical magic. I very quickly saw the commonality this “magic” had with all the other faiths and how it also had very distinct psychological characteristics.
During this encounter with Satanism, another important happening occurred, I began reading some of the myth of the Hindu faith. When I read the story of Arjuna and noticed how it is virtually identical in every way to that of the story of Moses, my mind began to race. My first discourse was to say that surely the Jews or the Hindi plagiarized. As the study of myth, magic, and religion continued however, I found it quite improbable that plagiarism was the solution. All of this investigation did depart me from Christianity for a time, as it was simply a vague concern to all other research.
Having had all this prior experience, I managed next to find Carl Jung and Quantum Physics. Jung’s theory of Synchronicity and the strange facets of Quantum starting giving me enough of a foundation for me to form my own belief system, which I had been searching after for literally years by this time. I was just as lost for a time after finding this foundation as I had ever been. This being due to stepping into a territory of self-responsibility I had never had before. I was suddenly responsible for the contents of my mind and how I viewed the world and I finally knew this fact!
What ended up developing (to hurry this story along a little bit), was a theory which is somehow both devout to deities of all varieties and at the same moment atheist. How this works is as follows: 1) God is but a title to the very real and verifiable objective truths of the universe. 2) The exact name of this title (e.g. God or otherwise), is irrelevant until much other work has been gone through. 3) Based on the previous two points the idea of God and the Universe itself are identical and either name can be used based upon one’s personal preference. This theory is steeped deeply in mysticism and spirituality, magic, and what is perhaps most important of all science! The only difference between the science of so much of the world and the variety I use is on a matter of empiricism. I accept Jung’s theory of empiricism, meaning that I accept the subjective experience which I have as a valid form of study. The goal is objectivity of course, but the system of science I use gives recognition to the imperfection of my perceptions, and that by also studying these imperfections I may get closer to actual objective truth which I would hope is the goal of any scientist!
